The Cold, the Wind, and the Spirit

The main reason that I never thought we would move back to Fort Wayne is the cold. 

When I was twenty-two I worked part time in a toy shop located in drafty, cold old school. My fingers began to turn purple, swell up, and develop open sores. My mom and I went to a dermatologist who scared me by taking pictures of my fingers and naming the diseases that I probably had--scleroderma or lupus. I had neither, just Raynaud's disease, which is sometimes a symptom of these more serious conditions, but in my case it just means that I need to watch my exposure to cold.

In Raynaud's disease the blood vessels spasm, then close, blocking blood flow. There's a medicine that I have on hand if I need it. I haven't taken it in decades, but it's in my kitchen cabinet now, just in case. As I remember, it turns me very pink as it does its job of opening all of my blood vessels.

Growing up, I never enjoyed the cold, and this condition gave me another reason to see it as my enemy.

Months ago, I read about French peasants in the mountains, generations ago, moving as little as possible and mostly staying in bed all winter. It sounded good to me, but not very practical.

So, I've been embracing the season instead of hiding from it this year. I've gone for walks in the snow.

 Looking for beauty, and finding it.

After a snowfall, I pop outside and take pictures. Sometimes, our yard looks like Narnia.

And there's Pepper, of course. She loves the snow. Her enthusiasm is contagious.

I've gone cross-country skiing. I fall on the slightest of inclines, but I don't mind falling and looking silly.

And I've run in it. A lot. When I run, I'm warm. 

Sometimes my hands are so warm that they get hot and I take off my gloves to cool them down.

Today, it's cold. The thermometer read minus seventeen fahrenheit this morning. I've listened to the wind these last two nights, in bed. It's too cold to take pictures, or play with the dog outside. 

A friend said to me yesterday that Spring will be all the sweeter this year. It's true. I will bask in it and barbecue and rake and plant.

And as I reflect on the wind and wonder how to embrace these days too, I've thought of the wind in scripture--Jesus' words to Nicodemus, who came to him in the night, about the Spirit coming like the wind, blowing where it wishes. And I've thought of the one hundred twenty gathered when they heard the sound of a mighty wind and the Holy Spirit fell on them and the church began. 

So, on these cold, windy days, I pray for my city of Fort Wayne. The city I've returned to even though I thought I had left it for good. I pray for peace and justice because I know that where the God reigns, there is healing and wholeness, justice and mercy. And my city needs these things.